it was about afternoon

when she said, "i dont know how else to explain it.. he's different from the other guys i've met". i replied quite quaintly, "have you ever thought of the possibility that this guy is only different to you because he has never met a girl like you before? he could be.. hm.. inexperienced with your higher level of experience? then with that in mind, would you consider that down-grading?"

"what do you mean?"
"well, i'm pretty sure you know his past - and he knows yours. but look at what you've gone through.. and what he's gone through. you're the girl that's got him on a whole new level of relationship. but for you, you've BEEN through that level already. you're not as amazed as he is. you've got more experience with this. wouldnt you want a guy who's at your level or higher?"
"hmm. i never really.."
"..thought about that?"
"yeah.. iono he's just different. but i can change him"
"oh yeah true. it'll be like your 'project'. i just think about this sort of thing sometimes coz its like, with your past you're used to being treated as His, as girlfriend-status. but with him it's like.."
"..i-gotta-teach-you type shit?"
"yeah..! exactly. which.. can be a good or bad thing."
both: "....(pause).... hahahaha!"
"i wouldn't call it down-grading though. you get to teach him thingsssss..."
"yeah i guess so. i'm just sorda impatient yno? i'd have to start from scratch then work my way up. but EH, whatevers. im just sayin.. i think about these things sometimes... Doesn't it suck to have gained so much information that you get to the point where you.."
"..tend to over-analyze things?"
"yeah.. even the simplest things aren't so simple anymore.. everything just got more complex.. like this idea on top of another idea branches off into another idea.. hoo! i hate over-analyzing."
"yeah me too."

temp. blog

is it really that hard to put a brave face on? man up and take charge. stop whining and Do it already. it was yours to begin with.




laziness must end!
heart, cheryl.

gnite

update2.

santa cruz seemed like the perfect plan for thursday. friends that came with; accompanied by laghitched a ride with johnnybravo.finallyyyyyy!!!!
mark decides to cuddle in the sand.. in his... sand cradle.. josh makes johnny a sand dick. suck it. crunch it.

speaking of crunch.. josh c (whitersx) bit a sand crab.. mmmmm...
...josh c (timothy) decided to keep one.. (that was alive) walk the boardplayed dress upacted gay..went fishing woo & ate calamari mmm acted gay AGAIN (back in the area; one of the newark taps) / went to johnny's to visit these babies ^_^
baby aeolus
baby soft-shell
&baby vishnu. oooocutie. it's only the size of a quarter. ^_^

that was fun stuff. haven't been to the beach in AGES.. the sun felt very comforting though. i think i heard once, "the sun is the poor man's blanket". haha. i kinda fell asleep on the sand though with the sun lightly warming my skin. nicolen was beside me too. lol. *ahh* hair blowin in the wind, sun glistenin off my skin...