happy 10..

oh yeah you dont celebrate those.

a rare species

i know you're supposed to treat others the way you want to be treated. i know, i know. but what happens when you "kill'em with kindness" and get nothing nice in return?!i'm not focused on the act of receiving something back, i just wanna know where all the genuinely considerate and polite people have gone!

??

either i'm really old school, or these people have become veryyy hard to find.. maybe even extinct. to come in contact with one is like a diamond in the rough!

everyone seems to be too busy, preoccupied with other things, or focused on themselves. or they simply don't care. or perhaps the media has influenced them (have you listened to the radio lately?!) there could be a bajillion factors that come into play with the extinction of this species. there is no single answer.

i haven't seen anyone trying to fix this - all except maybe Ne-yo, who brought out Year of the Gentleman. (this could be based on your taste in music. i personally like r&b) in his lyrics, he was thoughtful enough to appreciate the other person, instead of himself. (miss independent). or in other tracks, (these tracks were not on the US albums) such as "in the way" and "what's the matter". if you listen to the lyrics, you can see his genuine consideration for everyone but himself. hence, the gentleman title.

[oh and this dude i follow on twitter, @treatwomenright. his name says it all]

i'm not saying stop paying attention to yourself. of course, we all have to focus on ourselves too. please, take a shower. please, brush your teeth. please, do your homework first! please, prioritize realistically. but, when you have another encounter, even just a smile can go a long way.. maybe make somebody's day. it doesn't hurt!

or just being polite

at my work, i usually start with a "hello, how are you?" and they would respond with a "fine thanks how are you?" and while i'm saying "i'm fiii-" they'd cut me off saying "deposit please". everytime i get those, i feel like they skipped the appetizer and went straight for the entree. saying it "just to say it" has no feeling, no heart involved! i know, it's a bank.. that's what we do.. but what i'm trying to say is subconsciously acknowledging the other person does not count.

from that point, we drag on with the day. one boring person after the next.. rude, heartless, non-existent.

i'm sure there are times where you've been invited to someone's birthday, but they didn't make the time for yours. or when you've spotted somebody for dinner, and you haven't heard from them since. or when you would drive far distances for a friendship/relationship, (literally and figuratively), yet they wouldn't drive as far for you. or when you make the effort, and they don't. or when you do your homework, and someone just copies off yours.

BECAUSE OF THOSE REASONS there are people out there who AREN'T considerate enough of others... we're sick and tired of not being treated the way we want to be treated.. which is why (epiphany) the polite/thoughtful/gentleman species has become extinct!

reviving this generation will take some time and patience. being one amongst many can brainwash you back into the crowd. but please, think otherwise! bring this species back!

have a heart!

quick to judge.

sometimes you can't rely on one-sided perspectives. if you take the time to view your situation in a different light, it's not so bad after all!

1) everything isn't always based off first impression.

(although first impressions mean a LOT; i'd have to save that for another blog). i am a firm believer in second chances... so just wait it out for a bit longer! let the brand new friendship marinate for a bit, and wait for their true colors to come out. naturally.

2) so their true colors show. now what.

from here, you can decide if you want to go on with this person or not, cuz by this time, you'd already have a good idea of your future friendship. if you're liking it, that's a green light. (for those of you who might not know, green light = go for it). if not, well...

3) think about it this way.

maybe to you, you personally wouldn't want to be close friends with this person. but think aside for a second.. this is how this person naturally is. in short, "it is what it is" or "it be like that sometimes". lol. it might be difficult for some, but try to accept this person for who he/she is. for example, say i don't want to be friends with a coke addict who sniffs on a weekly basis. but, if i accept that person as a sniffer and get to know the true person inside, they're not so bad after all. or, say i just met a super valley girl like omg totally. if i muted out all her like's, omg's, and totally's, perhaps i could get to know her as a friend, and not somebody who i would have originally ignored.

however, in some cases, there there are clear distinctions of why this person is not a good "friend" candidate. of course you don't want to make friends with a rapist, convict, pedophile, etc..! let's be logical here! you always have a choice!

lol

4) why miss out on a possible friendship?

don't let your judgement get in the way of your possible friendship. (or any other person's judgement). take the one-on-one approach and get to know the person. "all the bullshit to the side"

nevertheless,

the more the merrier!

=)

he said he doesn't celebrate monthoversaries

i definitely won't forget that

iiiiits cuddle weather!

after eyeing the last minutes on the clock,

i hustle for my sweater, boots, and umbrella

drive straight home and switch into my sweatpants, hair tie

spritz a little of my favorite scent

and drive again

to my comfort zone, my cloud 9, my love

a place where we can be lazy

watch movies

grab a snack or two

play footsies

and cuddle

^_^

drake - up all night.

flies in my fries

i don't know why but i've been getting angry lately.

okay i know why; i just dont get how people are sometimes!

as we all know, every day is a new day. we start with a clean slate, a fresh mind, and a natural curiosity of what the new day beholds.

until someone opens their mouth and starts bringing up irritating topics of non-importance! like a fly continuously circling your dinner, go the fuck away! and next time you annoy me, i'll fuckin swat you!

k, maybe that was a bit harsh. although the flies are attracted to food, the food is not attracted to flies. who the heck wants flies in their food?! it's not appetizing! it's not even sanitary, especially if they're affecting your new, clean lifestyle... it can make you go rotten.

yes, you can say i've changed. if change can filter the flies out, then change is good. since ive been MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS, i'm cruising through life with a new mindset on things. a new mind means IVE GOT A DIFFERENT ACTION PLAN. so gtfo my french fries. stop trying to ruin my day.

if i have to change my location to get away from these flies, then i'll do it. change my food? sure. wear repellent? even better. shooing them away will only temporarily defer them, but flies are just one of those UNNECESSARY THINGS IN LIFE that can easily be HANDLED.

so stop shooing flies away and just swat them already!

start eating your food while it's fresh. tomorrow's a brand new day and you got everything going for you.

MOVE FORWARD

dear god,

as for the moment, i'd really like to get into the program! but, whatever You think is right for me, let it be so.

Amen.

love always,

cheryl

i really don't mind.

i've gone to the point where i really don't mind a day off when everyone else is busy. I really don't mind spending the day alone.

i really don't mind going to a party with hella people. I really don't mind if i'm not even invited.

I really don't mind mcdonalds

or olive garden

or alexander's steak house.

I really don't mind the generic brand so long as it works the same way.

I really don't mind the backseat instead of passenger seat (sometimes).

heh.

I really don't mind the mattress in the loft. I really don't mind the bedroom with a bed. I really don't mind a towel from Target instead of a Ralph Lauren one. I really don't mind using an old ass nokia phone. I really don't mind my beat up Chucks. I really don't mind the same purse (though, I wouldn't mind a new one either). I really don't mind doing my own nails instead of going to the salon.



dude.


relax.


not a big deal.



if i really wanted to have my way....

of course i'd choose otherwise. I would reconsider the outcome of my decision before settling with what the average pushover would choose. I mean, is a pushover really a pushover or is he/she really just a chill kinda person? kinda like a hippy; peace, good-vibes, no drama

PEOPLE,

the world does not revolve around a single person!

Upgrading and improving your life is one thing, but i'm fine with some of the things that i already own. certain things, though, i DO mind... like common sense things. Such as: yes i DO mind if you'd drive me there instead of walking out like this.

over the past few months, particular things haven't bugged me the way they used to. I've slowly accepted society's ways, even if I may not agree with it sometimes. My anger won't change society, considering i'm only one person of many. it's like a baby crying amidst a large crowd, such as a loud concert.

who would really hear you? anyone can hear you, but it's rare for anyone to actually listen to you. unless that baby is carefully watched by a guardian, [cough, attention whores] then i guess what i'm trying to say is "the ones who truly care about you will listen"

other than that, i really don't mind !

let's just be.

whatever, whenever

c <3 v

it's worth it at the end!

REPRESENT

(a mid-blog)

sitting there, my mind started to think off on a tangent. although we may not see how others view us, how do we represent ourselves to the world? do you show yourself as attractive? unappealing? proper? offensive? strong? weak? ... the list goes on.

i mean think about it, how did we come about these self-expressions?

there has to be some sort of filter. a guide. something that has narrowed our decisions to get us to where we are now. for some, it could be an event in our past, good or bad. or it could be someone we look up to; god, a family member, or a friend. there is a theory that says culture is the fastest way humans adapt. in other words, it is the fastest way to get humans to change.

like teenagers watching mtv and drooling over the latest one-hit-wonder. groupies.

how sensitive are we to culture? if you are who you claim to be, do you show it?

the reason why i mention this is because of something that happened at the bank the other day.

customer: "can i please have a copy of this check before i deposit it?"

teller: "i'm sorry sir, our policy does not allow us to make copies."

customer: "why not?? the branch where i live makes copies for me all the time."

teller: "sir maybe that branch makes an exception for you every time, but according to policy we cannot make copies. i'm sorry."

customer: "give me the check. what's your manager's name? i'm going to report that this branch has horrible customer service!"

if one teller represents all tellers for that bank, shouldn't we all have a unionized image? one person can ruin everyone's reputation.. if you catch my drift.

take for example these "christians"

really now? -______- aren't they supposed to love thy enemy?

and i'm sure you can all relate to this one:

oops i mean ***COPS who try to get at you for the most nonsense reasons! this is where you say, "you call this disturbing the peace??? REALLY?!"

have we forgotten who we represent? we decide how we want to portray ourselves based on things that are important to us. sure, you may hate homosexual people, but what about the others in that group you claim to belong in, do they also? sure, you say you protect the people but instead you're taking advantage of your powers? has it gone to the point where we forgot who else we are affecting? more importantly, the ones right under our noses, those amongst ourselves. the people who wear the same badge you're wearing!

there's no i in team!

If you are who you say you are, be it. Representation requires attraction, and if you're ruining it for everyone... that's not attractive at all.

REPRESENT

Hyderabad, India; day 2/4

Day 2 - the Leper Colonies

Leper Colony 1.

shunned from society, the lepers are forced to live in the outskirts or in little encompassed communities such as these:

as soon as they see our truck, they quickly gathered up on the sheets by the entrance to form an audience-like crowd because they knew something was in store for them. some even brought their previously used bags because they knew they were being fed today.

the kids were so grateful.. they would say thank you after you give them food and even after you answer their questions. lol. a group of girls asked me about school. they were like, "are you in college? what do you study? have you graduated? where? what do you want to do?" of course my usual response to those questions are "UH... getting there... not sure yet?? im still trying to find it..." and i'd say it in total embarrassment. i've been taking baby steps alright.

Leper Colony 2.

this is actually one of the fortunate houses within this leper colony that we visited. This house in particular belonged to our tour-guide/church-friend Sarah and her hubby Abraham. Limited electricity..

and only sunlight lit the kitchen.. she would have to light wood to cook. she said to us, "I'm praying for an electric stove"

they were blessed with a huge speaker! and a blanket. (that poster was her wedding sign; and those are their real names)

couple doors down was a "hospital". The lepers would come here every morning to get their lesions disinfected and banded. The lady doing the bandaging is actually Sarah's mom! The elderly lady getting bandaged started to cry a little when we got there. She was saying that her leprosy has not healed yet and it has been going on for too long and she just wants it to stop. Basically with leprosy, it progressively eats away your skin and through to your bones painlessly. so one day you can have a pinky finger, and next week it's just a stub and you didn't even notice. In this woman's case, she fears her foot is eventually going to deteriorate and she will be forced to walk on crutches.

a few of the neighborhood kids were running around playing. they ran up to our hands, grabbed them, and tugged us to come play with them. Julian and Sierra couldn't resist the offer

We returned to the main place where they gathered because the trucks with our food finally arrived. It was mainly women and children, very few men?

i took this pic from afar. looks like she was explaining to the other one what exactly was going on.. or they could be playing a game. I really feel for these kids who are born into these types of communities. They have no choice but to live within the walls of the leper colony without knowing what's on the other side of the wall? .. ??

passin out rice..

i dont know if you can see it on your screen, but if you look at these ladies' fingers, they have the lesions from leprosy. you can see that their limbs have been eaten away. They have no fingernails and some were missing whole fingers

day 3 next!

Hyderabad, India; day 1/4

finally... 4 months later!

Dear Mac Users,

firstly, i had planned to empty out my memory card before i went to India. so i saved my photos in a folder and hit delete and my mac looked like it deleted everything.. but for some reason my canon said it only had 140 picture space available? ?!!?!? a little frustrated, i figured that's all i would need.. right? well after my india trip i found out that with macs in particular, you also need to delete the photos in your trash box. -____-. then you'll be back at the however many gb's you started with. keep that in mind.

My friend Julian and I have always wanted to travel to a 3rd world country to help out (see bucket list post). so when Jubilee Church had an ad for an opportunity to go to India, we saved up our $$$$ and made it a reality. =)

I woke up super excited. "I'm going to INDIA!!!" i screamed. I've only been talking about it for.. ever. I checked my luggage.. made sure i had my itinerary.. and brought along a little pouch for rupees. Julian met at my house.. prayed a little prayer with mom & grandma.. and Vinny was ready to send us off to SFO airport.

like i've said, I love the airport. So many different cultures all in one building. The plane ride, however, was a dreading 16 hrs.. complete with tv's on the back of the seat in front of you, and uncomfortable back rests. Julian and I were still looking for our group, but we figured we'd see them once we've landed. off to india!so this right here is the airport in india. The golden arches never fail to stray from you, even if you're 1938749183 miles away... haha. We eventually found our group. the weather was wonderful. warm, around the 70's... (at night).about an hour later, we settle down in our hotel rooms. looks like your everyday hotel room, right? Coz it is.. Our group leader, Pastor Michelle Bernal, said "This is your oasis, you have a shower, toilet, and bed. We'll come back here after our missions, but when we're out there, there's no turning back. You'll have to wait til we get back to the hotel".we started out at 6am. i guess india wakes up early? I could hear the toots from the car horns and the vroom's from the motorcycles. almost everyone had either a motorcycle, or was traveling by taxi (the mini yellow cars). They looked like.. hmm.. the kid rides in the middle of the mall that cost like 50cents to ride. All automobiles looked shrinked compared to the auto's in the U.S. that's julian.and that's india's common ant! huuuuuge ant! about 3/4ths of an inch.

our first mission was at the dumps. as you can see, they made their own tents out of whatever they could find.. there were hundreds of them.. india doesn't really do much about these dumps coz very few people care.. and because there are so many, funding for them is an issue.

i pulled back the blinds in the bus and the first thing i see were these 3 excited faces.. they were SO happy to see us! They waved and we waved back. I turned to julian and said, "dude we're really here!" before we got off the bus, Pastor Michelle said, "keep all your stuff safely hidden. they will steal. and remember, we are there blessing, we are here to love them and pray for them."

they loooooooved to get their pictures taken. they'd always tug on me and say "one photo!" haha. it was cute. they'd make some silly face, then grab my arm to look at their picture and laugh their hearts out as if it were their only form of entertainment

we brought them some candy and every kid would come up to me asking for more. lol. i'd tell them, "i'm sorry i dont have enough..." i felt sooo bad.. but we packed them some food to hand out in the church (white building). we brought rice, oil to cook, and something from the lentil family called dahl.

we told them to form a line before we could pass out one of each, but since they were so hungry i think i saw a few people come in twice, or using their children to get seconds. we wanted to be fair, so we tried to give one per family. they had to have a ticket to get the food.. then we saw fake tickets.. then they crowded at the door! "one at a time!" it was chaos.. you can see julian at the door trying to hold them back because they would barge in like 10 at a time and we couldn't keep track of who was getting what. we even had to form a barrier by holding hands with eachother so nobody could sneak a bag for themselves. i felt horrible but if you're hungry, you do what you gotta do to get food, right.

some of the group members were amazed at how rowdy it was getting. we were giving them food, but they can't just steal seconds... we had to be strict.
we closed up all the doors of the church so nobody would snatch a bag. it made me wonder, how long do they have to wait for another batch of food? who gives them food? how long do they go without it? Pastor Michelle said many organizations like us help them out, but on some days nobody would come at all. they can be food-less for up to 3 days =\

afterwards, we ventured off into the neighborhoods

one of our group members brought her guitar and started singing christian songs to them. in this one she was singing Jesus Loves Me and she changed the lyrics to "you". =)
i'll have more tomorrow! so stay tuned.

currently:

i'm at daddy's feelin like a bed-potato coz just this past tuesday i woke up with a bad fever. 102degrees. =\. vinny took care of me all day. (thank you). i was hot & sweaty with goosebumps, had a throbbing headache, and dry coughs w/ phlegm. (how could a dry cough have phlegm? hah, trust me, it hurts). so today i went to my union city doctor and he said i have bronchitis. =T. he gave me a prescription for phenergan w/ codeine (yes, codeine) for the painful cough and augmentin for the infection caused by bacteria in my bronchioles. on top of that he suggested i continue using tylenol to reduce the fever. o_o. siiigh. such nice weather outside! i have work tomorrow though, i dont think i can make it. i already called out one day. eep. oh well. more tomorrow! back to water & rest..