blurt.

whyyyy do i get the feeling that i'm whooped..

i don't boast my love for you online, nor do i overload you with gifts n crap that supposedly "symbolize" my love... i'd rather just show it. naturally. the little things count, y'know. random kisses, occasional visits to your work before closing, and if i were walking down the aisles at a store and i spot something that made me think of you.. i might have bought it and gave it to you as a surprise.

of course, all in moderation.

none of that overly obsessive crap. your room is not crowded by heart shaped pictures of us nor does my tweet history show a timeline of every moment we spend together, since recording it as-we-speak would be ruining the now. [duh]. a.k.a. phone interception

and, none of that non-obsessive crap either! i am not spoiled by you, nor do i have my head in the clouds thinking that you'll always be there no matter what. i'm not going to take you for granted and im not going to flood you with obsessive love!

simply, i just feel that.. the times that i do think or show affection for you, there's no reciprocal. kinda like the gf who bought her bf an xbox360 and was never shown attention from her bf after that. she mistakingly thought that she was legitimately showing love to her bf, when instead, the guy thanked her for the gift and continued to play video games on it. sigh.. the gf ended up smashing the xbox with a hammer later on.

perhaps my definition of affection is strong yet sparingly, spread out amongst a long period of time. however i have noticed that with you, when you DO choose to show it, you go ALL out. like one jam-packed saturday vs an easy-going rest of the week.

i'll twerk my schedule for you. i'll pay for this dinner if you get next. i'll talk to your parents. i'll drive. i'll cook. i'll say sorry first if i know i did something wrong. i'm constantly re-evaluating my 1year gift for you! i'll pick up the redbox movie on my way to your house from work! i'll ask you about your day, but.. i never told you about my day? get the gist

EHyeaaaidunno.

i used to be careless with an "on-to-the-next" attitude, but i quit that. i love you, and i can't see myself with anyone else.

ps, come over sometime.