one weekend, different people.

don't mess with my head.

your shit won't work on me.

nope!

relax.

finals are done and i've finished my first quarter at de anza. it's officially spring break.. and i'm ready to get out. i love driving with no agenda.

one of my other loves is tapioca express. [fashooo!]. so i hit up tap, grab a classic milk tea and some squid. i love the squid okay don't hate! anywho, after that quick food-satisfaction, off to quizno's. i started to go off on a tangent about household families. your current household family status can tell you a lot about a person. take for example a little girl who grew up without a daddy. mothers comfort, daddies take the management position. (in a perfect world). [speaking of that, keri hilson's new album is the SHIT!] anywho, without a daddy to set the rules, that little girl will be so accustomed to mother's comforting.. therefore, = spoiled brat! poor girl, did she know that daddy had to leave? nope. mommy's gonna have to do this on her own. i feel for those families... not everyone is perfect. hang in there.. that little girl will grow up eventually.

clean out.
i wasn't exactly prepared to go clubbing or party on a friday night because it seems like ever since i started college, Thursdays and Saturdays are the new "Fridays". so what does that leave for college students on friday nights? 18+ clubs? heck no. trust me, there are way more things to do than go clubbing all the time, or hang out at starbucks everynight of that matter.

i never had the chance to check out downtown hayward. trees were lit by strings of lights all throughout the strip. looking left to right, theres a unique store or restaurant i never heard of. plazas get a little tiring and repetitive after awhile, if you catch my drift. this aint no union landing, that's for sure.

went to a italian restaurant on the strip and zomg their conchiglie is the freakn Best i ever tasted man, the portion was just right, the chicken was tender, the broccoli was a little scarce though, and the cream sauce omfg yum! thanks for the food.

took some old shit out my car. [thanks] even though it's free, i'd rather not keep something that isn't mine. purely out of respect for other people's things. if i really wanted it, i'd rather earn my own money to call it my own. just a cheryl thing.

[remind me to insert pictures]

comfort.

i respect my past, but i won't disrespect myself. meaning... i'll have an open ear for anyone in need, but i'd prefer not to be.. (hmm.. how shall i say this..) used?

anyway, went to the beach finally. it's the best place to release your thoughts, without having anyone around. just clear skies, and waves..

passed by a mall that was FILLED with filipinos. omfg i never seen so many in my life. guess which mall?it's sad how they "advertise" animals. they might change the words up a bit; "For Adoption". but really, it means "For Sale"=( poor yorkie.

family time.

my cousins came down from LA to visit. oh how much they've grown.. oh how much I'VE grown.. o_o

rachel's about to pass me up in height! wtf! haha. i was kneeling a little bit in that pic tho.

are you relevant?

woke up at 11:03am on a sunday and called immediately. "where are you? ! i just woke up!" "an exit away." whew. we still have time. today, was Paula White. and oh my, were we in for a surprise.

(that's her.)

she's awesome. fantasmic. great. ^_^.

this is what she shared..

being relevant is the ability to connect/relate to a situation. it consists of 3 parts; connection, compassion, and cover. [sounds weird, but it'll make sense.]

1) connection.

you are not alone. (duh). as humans, sure - we may have our differences that define us for who we are, but we're basically the same. it's just a matter of looking at the big picture, rather than the details. you could say oh, he's not the one! the grass is greener on the other side! niggaplease. the grass is greener where you water it.

2) compassion.

there is a clear distinction between sympathy and empathy. sympathy is where you feel exactly what the other is going through, due to experience n whatnot.. but Empathy, on the other hand, is imagining/understanding/intellectual identification for another person's thoughts. Feel for that person, put yourself in their shoes. you can give your advice, but the real advice is yourself. your life is the sermon.

no matter who it is, no matter what they're going through, love them anyways. [reference to first blog entry]. you can say "i been through this, you don't understand that".. but what you've Done is not who you Are. with that said, your examples can only go so far. another person's decisions are not your responsibility.

3) are you covered?being covered is the feeling of being safe, valued, protected. in times of crisis, whatever is inside of you will come out. naturally, it happens. right? each "crisis" is like an opportunity.. just when something great is about to happen, the worse comes to worst. perfect! don't fight the process. stop reacting, and start responding. god's positioning you for something great, whether it be a breakthrough or a slight change in your life, an upgrade... that's exactly the perfect timing for a crisis.. because something was meant to come out of you. this is where You become relevant.

on another note, i've come to dislike smooth sailing because it's like being in stagnant waters; nothing changes, nothing is improving. it almost worries me when everything is going just fine...

if you don't Know better, you won't Do better. ex.: if all you know is one option, then that's what you get. nothing more, nothing less. if you surround yourself with what you Don't Know, check yourself - you might come to realization.

no matter what you're going through, no matter what humanistic "earthly" thoughts you might possess, god still loves you. =)

so do i.

all the things you went through, prepares you.

Ready for the ride?

;)

cleaning

under construction.
needs more pictures
less repetition
more New shit
less bullshit
more realshit


r i p conrado j barba.

21st; recap

it is currently finals week and i feel like blogging to release a few thoughts that have slowly built up in my head this past month.

march 12th 2009 - my 21st birthday.

went to school and had a quick debate about internet's usefulness with communication. note to boys: don't ever get at a girl by passing your phone to her and have a text of what you were to have said in person but was too shy to do so. it's just wrong. i shake my head in shame. in terms of "communication", in-person is always the best way to go. after that, left cupertino & headed to yoswirl. thanks for the news; i can't tell whether to be happy or sad..

HELLLA rushed home and showered super late. manda & kessy came to help me get pretty. ty =). first & foremost, thank you all for attending. =) i love having all my close friends there, even if you're all from different groups. basically, that whole section i had reserved at tomodachi's showed all the many sides of cheryl; each table representing a "side". lol. i love that though; variety, diversity. not just one specific and possibly biased group - it's a mix. ^_^ oh, and thank you to those who got me sakebombs and to kevs who bought the me & the whole table's food. haha =)

surprisingly after that night i didnt do shit. i felt like chillin? and that's what i did; w/ bffs amanda & kessy. i wanted to save the yackin' for another awesome night. hahaha =). special thanks to amanda & kessy for helping me get ready the hour my bday started haha. [i was super late] and thanks to all for the gifts =). being 21 didnt hit me that night. or even the next night. it semi-hit me on saturday; i'll get back to you on that though.

march 13th; rhian's 21st.

rhian was so silly on her bday. too bad i missed out on the yack-scene in the karaoke room, but i still came through. i liked rhian's thing though, a karaoke room is all you need to have fun =D. hahaha. really though! if you all know the songs then it's all g! haven't seen a few of these people in awhiiiiiile... from L-R: tyson; 's leaving for sd soon. i; look fugly. angela; since 5th grade zomg! danny; he's gay. kessy; bff blinked. haha. there are more pics w/ bday girl but in other people's cameras.. =(. i brought mine, but left the battery in the charger at daddy's house. =(. funstuff though, never thought i remembered spicegirls and britney spears' lyrics lol. i mean seriously, if you have fun doing that and your friends sing along with you; you can have a good-ass time! hahaha. it's oldschool stuff, and i miss it ever-so.

march 14th; what a fckn agenda.

woke up and went to mccormick&shmick's for lunch. yum & thank you. got a disturbing-yet-exciting phonecall from daddy, saying "go to dnb's". after the lunch, i find out daddy had a surprise bday for me at dnbs with my cuzzos + fam. i totally rocked at pool that day. hahaha. daddy's side is so much more fun. yes i have 1/2white cousins. lol kirk
og'skinda blurry but those were the girlies playing pool. me n nancy totally won.

THEN we watched watchmen. thumbsdown for the blueman. omg he was so horrible. and the ending. i applaud the characters though, my favorite was rorschach. BEST SCENE goes to rorschach's prison cafeteria scene: "You're all locked in here with ME" zomg was aweeeeesomeeeee!! hahaha. i loved his character. very reserved with a hidden dominance to him. all of it is complete confidence in one view of life: HIS. go watch that scene tho bluh.

ate @ the coconut grove then straight to uc.

entourage @ motif downtown sj.

kessy & david drove down to uc then kessy decides to grab a lil suttin-suttin at kaenyama's off automall. i met her kuya mark, an awesome guy who has a hellofa lot of hookups. lucky for us, drinks were on the house =). we paid for the sushi and headed to motif. we almost didn't go due to current events that made us feel down, but for the sake of the night, we pushed forward. we get there and the club across the street apparently looked crackin' [wet], but they were so packed that we couldn't get in.

so we're in motif and it seemed dead. couple mins pass, and some asian dude starts to chat w/ us. "you want something to drink?" us: "^_^ " him: "okay". haaaaahahahha! so we drink and it still didnt seem satisfying enough. kessy says "i wonder what's upstairs..." so she works her magic and next thing i know we're fckn upstairs and its helllllla crackin!

hahaha.. asian dude [luan] introduces us to some of his friends and his homeboy robbie [my bad for calling you david? blame it on the -]. so we dance like baydestrians goin dumb in a ladylike fashion all night havin a fuckn blast. lol. btw, a note to girls: the guys dont grab you, they actually make-way for you. oh and you can dance w/ a drink in your hand. THAT is how you know you're at a 21+club! hahaha =). when the music died down, we went downstairs to chop it up w/ luan and robbie. they both seemed super cool so we offered to drive them to their car. said our goodbyes, and goodnight.

no pics tho, coz i cant find the photographer for that night. =( sawrry.

UPLOAD MORE LATER GNITE

everyday lifestyle

just as my life was starting to get dull & blue, i closed my hands together and shut my eyes.

reassurance.

saturday there were options...

telly
open-mic
open house party

but instead i was bought by $55 to this thinger called an "Encounter". it's where people come up in front of a podium and discuss their life changing events in order to help YOU out.
ok no honestly they added in that god is with you always; no matter what. it might seem like AA to you, but i assure you, it's nothing like it. they passed out these little booklets that had the whole "idea" outlined for you, and of course complementary food & drinks. at the end of each "topic", we would pray. prayer is very hard to describe, but it's something along the lines of communication and acknowledging.

that whole deal lasted from 8-5, sitting next to mother and a whole bunch of other women. (the men had their own room.) everyone was older than me, mostly moms and single women .. and there was a point where everyone in the room cried atleast once, except me. i wondered, why am i not crying?! i feel it, but no tears? then a lady came from behind me n mom, and without knowing us she pinpointed our situation exactly and prayed with us. tears started to flow uncontrollably...

there was something about that experience that left me with a smile and a better mindset.. there will be better days with this in mind. =)

one word: refreshing.

how much is enough? where do you draw the line/ give up/ stop? should you ever give up? honestly, no. pussy. are there times where you have to stop? yes.

but DO you draw the line? what's holding you back? why is there a doubt in your head???

sometimes the situation at hand can be very upsetting, and people might want to stray from that. or they are just unaccepting of the real world scenario.. so, they say things that they didn't mean to say.

unfortunately for those on the other end, we will never know unless confronted - and i thank you for that.with that said, Do Your Thang. and i'll do mine.

lucky me, i turn legal this thursday. 21 ya beeeezyyy! i'm so excited. 21. i can officially order things off tv, walk into 21+ events without worrying, buy alcohol & get carded, go to vegas, and all that extra shnazz... care to join?

a slight change of thought. what is the American Dream? typically, we see happiness in family, success, and fame. what exactly does that mean though? first thoughts: 2 story house w/ a green lawn, a family with kids and a dog, and some ballin' ass cars parked on the driveway. ferraris, preferably. i found out that I currently reside in what is called a "track home". track homes are your typical 2 story houses that are the exact same-4 models that are closely built together and hardly distinct from each other.

if you think about it, most americans dream for the same thing - the same robot-like houses, the happyfamily, the money. how did we come about with that thought? tv? what the government sets up for us? the dream is easily drawn... like kb homes; efficient visions of success don't forget to make room for more? everyone can dream! dream the same thing! somewhere, aside from all the media and american androids who have persuaded you, there is a Real dream. you might want to step out of US boundaries to find it...

meanwhile, bff amanda pointed out about our ancestries. for the both of us, our families grew up with the mindset that 'we had it hard back in the days'. the life in our old countries was horrible; always cleaning, poor quality homes, maybe not even a home?, scruffy lifestyles, etc.. so we (family) moved to the US in hope of a better future, a better place to live with higher standards in quality - yes; that is why we are here. we show much more appreciation for these "robot-homes", and for those who are spoiled, (us), they show bore with "the everyday" in the US, when really it's such an honor to be here

i dunno if that made any sense. whatevers. next topic:

newly downloaded: google chrome. (www.google.com/chrome)

i have been using avant browser for 3? years now, and i still think avant is the fastest browser i've had, minus the lag of my uber old man-made computer. internet explorer is by far the slowest, and i haven't used mozilla enough to know it's capabilities.. but this new chrome thing is quite interesting. it reminds me of apple products. hella easy to use, simple/minimal design, does the zooming thing. and personally, i like it. it's still undergoing some upgrades and loading might be a little slow - then again that depends on your computer speeds n such. check it out; if anything you can always remove it later. =]

**** 4 stars!

Some Foods Yum Nom-Nom

the other day i found yet another yogurt place by my school: diy yogurt.

that was from the parking lot. sorry. i got a mix of green tea and original with strawberries and mochi. i tried it and zomg the green tea reminded me of red mango's =x! RED MANGO IS MY FAVORITE YOGURT PLACE coz their greentea one is not too sweet, not too sour! yay for local yogurt shops! diy is cheap too. heyyy =]this right here is cafe zen's "heaven". the guys always get this. it's so wonderfully special that i can't disclose it's true name. but, i can tell you, it sure tastes like "Heaven".

rachel bonking her head on a ?brick. guess which game it's from?

have a nice day. thank you for your time

birthday part2 in the wrx

twist, with force

my head's thinkin,
if i could,
i would grab you by the neck,
throw your face down on the cement,
step on your face,
and twist


but i'm not gonna do it.







i'll tell everybody right now.
don't ever
let anyone
ANYONE.
mistreat you.
treat others,
the way
you want to be treated.