pictureblog! anti-tumblr

know you're tired of the usual ;)

@Hecho

haha <3

@ the KID CUDI!!! concert

random bbq, with all 5 of us

(my most recent pic, with new haircut!)

being a robot in mountain view

rachel's a 1/2 inch taller now. ;( and, she passed middle school!

@bay2breakers

i swear skydiving is coming up next. soon. stay tuned!

can't wait!!!

we do this thing where we put all our thoughts and concerns to Him.. taking it off our shoulders and letting Him take care of the situation, as he takes care of us. but, like all relationships, it takes 2 to tango. so before anything, we do what we can - as He continues to carry on His plan he has for us. each and every one of us have unique, tailored plans.. just as we are all unique in His eyes. He loves us all, and he will continue doing what he's been doing, that is, guiding us to our success through Him.

so,

i pray that this works out in god's favor.

amen.

for those of you who dont know exactly what Amen means, it's a derivative of the Hebrew word aman which is "to strengthen" or "confirm".. aka "so be it".

When we have weak core muscles, it's much harder to maintain good posture.

fuck it! slouch, eat a big mac, sit all day

of lower rank

happy 1yr & 3mo... ah fuck it who am i kidding.

not myself lately. turtle mode.

kawawa. downtime.

you really, really, really, really, REALLY, suck.


i can't expect anything from you, but it kinda comes with my title. with past experience, ive learned how to be and how not to be and i feel like THIS cheryl, the cheryl NOW, is the finished product.. like 10 + 10 = 20 times better! add it all together and you've got a super sized meal!

as if i've surpassed the boss level in a video game!

a fuckin good-ass-deal!

having said that, i feel that i am better than ever =)

but..

it's not appreciated.

WHY does it feel like i have no value?! not exactly pushed aside, i just.. feel like.. i'm not.. getting what people at my level should have in return. appreciation. worth. uniqueness.

let's recap; i can't expect anything from you, but it kinda comes with my title. save me from worthless tears and just denote me down a notch. i don't know how much longer i can stay like this.

dear diary

had an AWESOME weekend! first time @ bay2breakers AND a strip club, AND walked from market to the pier for what seemed like decades. i guess i had it reversed, i had a shot of vodka first thing in the morning, THEN i ate a breakfast burrito. lol. it was soooo cool! i wish i had a new camera so i could show you pictures but fortunately i'm saving my money for vegas with 4 semi-new girl friends. anywho, bay2breakers! my first time! lots of halloweenish costumes.. less slutty.. more weird, dorky, themed, and people bouncing in the nude. a littttttle disturbing! heh! my favorite was the group that planned for the rain.. all the girls dressed up as shower mesh sponges and the one and only guy dressed up as a shower! curtain included! hahaha HOWEVER it didn't rain at all! it was surprisingly veryyyy sunny. still cold tho, it's sf after all. we walked from bart to catch up with the crowd, got lost within the crowd, separated from our original group, weaved through the crowd, found some friends and drank some more (btw vince brought his camelback and filled that up with some vodka). hahaha... then we found circle of people surrounding wrestling match between not-so-similar weight classes. haha... sad to say one of the filipinos horribly lost.. i think he was just half drunk and flubby. saw some more old naked people.. tits.. junk.. then after the crowd dispersed a little more, we found 2 members from our original group and decided to walk around with them to look for a bar. COULDNT FIND a worthy bar, so we walked and walked and walked from bay2breakers to the strip club... there were only 2 black girls who were swapping the stage. one of them could climb the pole with her body, the other couldn't. phino handed me a wad of dollar bills and sat me down smack dab in the front of all the action =x! and yes; i tapped that ass. ;) my facial expression was like this the whole time: o_o . . . i didn't know how to react! awkward and it didn't turn me on at all? im not even sure if i'm supposed to be turned on?! that was my first time as well. haha. then from the strip club to the pier! from being denied of 50% off at bubbas to being approved of 50% off at rainforest cafe. UGHHHH you could imagine all the walking we did? i desperately had to call-in the next day. couldn't move my legs or keep them standing! then we randomly met up with the rest of our group and fell asleep on our bart ride back home. i love being buzzed all day. :D

ok now im sad again. this isnt going anywhereee... comfortable - lil wayne.

MAN you suck.

DAY 1 - The Return of Cheryl

day 1 is definitely not how i thought it would be. i took a step back from the box* to analyze what i was doing, and what situation i was in.. and after thinking on it, i realized that i was brainwashed into following a pre-destined path my mother had set up for me. she advertised it well, weighing out the pro's and con's.. as well as throwing in a few promotions of her own, such as a free room and free food. but we ALL KNOW that nothing in life is free! so of course i had to read the fine print: "the promoted free room is next door to a 13 year old girl who is still not mature. across the hallway is a room with traditional-style grandparents who will scold you for anything that is seen non-traditional. across the other hallway is your mother who will always nag you no matter what until you get your shit together"

it's like i'm back at square one. but i refuse to consider this as "square one"

atleast this time around, i actually have something accomplished. so, technically, this would be square Two! haha

babysteps, i guess.

aha! that's exactly it - babysteps! i need to stop mentally punishing myself for not being where i wish i was.. and instead i should just appreciate where i AM, and what i've DONE to get myself in the place i'm currently in. maybe we should all take a

*moment of appreciation*

that is all for day 1. appreciate today, rest, go on with externships, and proceed to square three when ready. got it!

=)

*macbook reboot sound*

i guess i should update you guys with what's really going on right now, because the previous post is so last month!

ha!

after countless nights of contemplating til 2am, i've come to conclude that my personality has reached a pleateau. that would explain why i felt down-in-the-dumps at any given event, and why i honestly had nothing cool or important to talk about anymore. I was irritable.. bland... and lifeless, if you may.

=\

where has all of cheryl gone? what happened to those times where people would say, "cheryl would do that" or "that's so cheryl!" haha. i needed to put the cheryl back in cherylness.blogspot.com. and of course, i was/am destined to restore what was once mine!

so i'm coming back. with a new twist.. i'm 23 now, not 19, not 20, not 21, not 22.. but yes, 23. although i may not know what to do, i know now what NOT to do. (i'll let you re-read that)

ahh, the feeling of something fresh & new. i'm all for it! and i hope you'll stick around to continue reading my blogs.. cuz there will definitely be more updates in the (very) near future.

so far, here are my current updates:

-graduated from my pharmtech program

-starting pharmtech externships perhaps as soon as tomorrow

-moving back to moms

-not stopping there! continuing with school and aiming for that degree!

-VEGAS finally with all girls! (yes, i'm 2 years late. this is my first time going with friends and not family)

-SKYDIVING IS A MUST. since i couldn't do it last year

-ziplining next month. woot!

-no more Chase!

&more later..

;D

<3c.

"silence is a girl's loudest cry. you can tell she's really hurt when she starts ignoring you"

3.20.11

i tend to wander off to blogland before an important exam.. i guess i gotta let out some thoughts that take part in my overpopulated brain. =)

3.12.11

had an awesome surprise bday!

thanks baby. ;) apparently i drank so much that i left everyone and wandered off on my own for an hour. lol.. that's bruno fitzmars standing next to me haha

and thank again babe, for eliminating the stacks of cds in my car! =D

3.18.11

and thanks kuya fred & jon for the last minute, random invitation to Jo Koy! he was the perfect comedian for my first comedy show =D

AND PASSION WAS THERE TOO! he sang my favorite song: musiq soulchild - just friends =D! i melted in my seat when i heard it! (no cameras allowed during the show, sorry!) oh but i'll share with you my favorite song of his, it's an original! meaning from the heart =) >

ps, happy 1 year & 1 month

thanks for your time!

back to the exit exam -______-

update version 3.7.11

if you do the math,

living (somewhat) on your own + a raise in your paycheck $$$ + awesome boyfriend + being around good people + graduating this month - minor day-to-day complaints = overall, life is swell.

as most of you know, dad has left the building (home) for about 2+ months now. he probably migrated down south of california, where employment rates appear to be rising. he's honestly never told me. none, zip, nada. don't think he ever will. but he's safe, and he's making his own money, and he calls to check on me everyday. i'm happy for him. =)

as for my other boyfriend..

just celebrated our 1 year!

spotted banksy! some dumbos edited it tho. -_-

fauncy dinner for two!

(i look weird in that picture)

then dinner day 2 !

NOMical.

and i'm happy to announce the return of Cassandra! wooooooo! she hasn't come out to play yet, but we're finally able to talk to each other on the phone again. it's a start. =) i miss her and i'll always be here for her. (left)

i... went to a big sean concert ? hah.. some guy who likes to say "boiii" a lot.

"finally famous over everythaaang"

if there were such thing as second-hand smoking from weed, i probably caught it at the concert. HELLAsmoke.

pardon my old 6mp camera. -_- i wanna new one! scratch that.. *need

new favorite bar - Single Barrel! usually when i find a good thing, i like to share.. but in this case, i'd prefer to keep this gem exclusive. from the customer service, to the decor, to the ambience, and especially to their rare drinks catered to your liking... i rate this place 100 stars and beyond. i would tell you guys what it's like inside, but i think it would ruin my credibility. you HAVE to go there in person to get the full experience. yes; it's not just a bar, it's an EXPERIENCE. their name is all i'll give.. once you find it, you wont be disappointed! promise.

my program finishes this month and im super excited! THIS MONTH! i'll gain experience in the field and then we'll see where it goes from there. chemistry, however, was never my strongest subject to begin with. blegh. anywho, i am featured in a video, for those who are considering the program. i look very very ugly. here's the link. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QYsMJggHUA

hahhhh... *blush*

my birthday's this saturday and i have no clue what to do! a dinner with babe at _________ (he still hasn't decided yet). im down for anything.. i wanted to go to miyakes in palo alto like how ashley s. did, but my friends are all broke so exnay that place. =( i want a few things for my bday, but it seems like as the years go by, the list gets smaller, and more pricey. like, a new car! for example. or, a new apartment to call my own! or, a flatscreen tv! or, a camera! (well, that's not TOO pricey) or skydiving!

but there is one thing that i really want that's not pricey at all.. a turtle! yes, another turtle. aeolus & vishnu grew way too big.. here's a size comparison of Aeolus.

yup. crazy. for my next victim, i wanna keep him baby-sized. small turtles are just cuter, and easier to manage. i heard that the bigger the tank, the bigger the turtles get. hence Aeolus' picture above. they were quite healthy! haha. i'd love to get a map turtle with spikes.. *hint to anyone who's reading this*

other than those listed above, i haven't really learned much in terms of blog topics. i guess this time in my life is all evaluation and planning. i'm starting to get more conscious of my health, simply from evaluating other people's lives. some are getting fatter, some are fit with muscles now, and others are still eating out at fastfood joints. there are a lot of things to consider; stress, hormonal levels, and sleep to name a few. so i'm watching out for myself. better to start early, than later. i've even started using an eye cream for my eyes so i don't get under-eye circles or dark spots when i'm older! haha.. and iono about your friends, but it seems like babies are popping out everywhere! soon enough, my schedule will be filled with babyshowers and weddings o_o. fuuuuck.. in terms of babies, i'm definitely not ready for one yet. i have to tackle one goal at a time. but, from observing how children are getting raised, im getting a few ideas of how i wanna raise mine. &taking notes. what not to do, that's for sure. haha. i guess i did learn a few things after all?

wellps, i got a practical tomorrow and written exam next week so i guess i this is where i conclude. i'll report back when i have something to blog about.

continue on! =)

foreign cinema; must see! *adding to to-do list*

sometimes you need to be reminded

remind me not to overanalyze things!

just an old tendency that seems to come up every so often..

and remind me not to think too far ahead in the future! the unknown stresses me out!

=)

ness ness ness

never see me again - kanye

sounds like kanye's drunk-rapping the whole song, but the beat fits it well. i looove a good character; a bit of anger, a bit of sadness, fed-up, cockiness (of course), sarcasm, realness, and some craziness .. add an ironic beat, and it's like ending on a happy note.

great song!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f5EPGfPPwQk

skydiving = $300

rachel here muahahaha jk (im her sister)

blurt.

whyyyy do i get the feeling that i'm whooped..

i don't boast my love for you online, nor do i overload you with gifts n crap that supposedly "symbolize" my love... i'd rather just show it. naturally. the little things count, y'know. random kisses, occasional visits to your work before closing, and if i were walking down the aisles at a store and i spot something that made me think of you.. i might have bought it and gave it to you as a surprise.

of course, all in moderation.

none of that overly obsessive crap. your room is not crowded by heart shaped pictures of us nor does my tweet history show a timeline of every moment we spend together, since recording it as-we-speak would be ruining the now. [duh]. a.k.a. phone interception

and, none of that non-obsessive crap either! i am not spoiled by you, nor do i have my head in the clouds thinking that you'll always be there no matter what. i'm not going to take you for granted and im not going to flood you with obsessive love!

simply, i just feel that.. the times that i do think or show affection for you, there's no reciprocal. kinda like the gf who bought her bf an xbox360 and was never shown attention from her bf after that. she mistakingly thought that she was legitimately showing love to her bf, when instead, the guy thanked her for the gift and continued to play video games on it. sigh.. the gf ended up smashing the xbox with a hammer later on.

perhaps my definition of affection is strong yet sparingly, spread out amongst a long period of time. however i have noticed that with you, when you DO choose to show it, you go ALL out. like one jam-packed saturday vs an easy-going rest of the week.

i'll twerk my schedule for you. i'll pay for this dinner if you get next. i'll talk to your parents. i'll drive. i'll cook. i'll say sorry first if i know i did something wrong. i'm constantly re-evaluating my 1year gift for you! i'll pick up the redbox movie on my way to your house from work! i'll ask you about your day, but.. i never told you about my day? get the gist

EHyeaaaidunno.

i used to be careless with an "on-to-the-next" attitude, but i quit that. i love you, and i can't see myself with anyone else.

ps, come over sometime.

o m g i'm almost 23.